Exploring The Energy Behind Symptoms

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I painted this when I was young, maybe close to 10-12 years old. It happened sparatically after my grandmother lead me through the sensations I was experiencing. She practiced and used to receive Reiki. As an adult, I would describe it as a Shamanic experience or vision quest.

I had a high fever from the flu. This painting is a rendering of how the energy felt in my body at the time. This painting is special to me, as it marks my first experience being aware of the subtle energies related to sickness that can be felt as “densities” in the energy system.

This has led me to ask more questions about the universe, humanity and sickness as I grew up. I eventually learned that this was a form of remote viewing. The data is contextual and hyperdimensional. We gain access to this subtle flirting with our conciousness when we clear our minds of the constriction held there.

It was a defining moment for me, as my grandmother encouraged me to explore the fear there instead of resigning from it. This has formed the basis for my awareness practice. It also brought me to a new understanding of disease and trauma.

When I look at this painting today, it clearly resembles an aomeba-like form. The colors were intended to be a muddy, redish brown to resemble the congestion and heat I was experiencing.

There was another energetic “form” I was experiencing, that I am well aware of even today if I get sick. It felt like a heavy weight that consumed my whole body. Even at that age, I compared it to a massive mound of clay that was dumped on top of me, weighing me down. Pushing against this clay resulted in resistance – the resistance to my healing.

As my grandmother was leading me through this Shamanic passage into higher awareness, I began exploring that dense pressure instead of fighting it.

This experience may have helps the sickness clear up. That part I do not remember. However, the event struck a realization in me that had to be documented. Even as this watercolor painting was in process, I was feeling those sense energies in my body, even after I was well. The process enlivened me.

What do you see in the painting?
Do you ever just stop and feel?

Joey Esposito – Bioenergist

Reactivity Protocol

When we are in a problem set, we cannot see the solution. It seems to be outside of us. To escape the loop of suffering, we must suspend the notion of an external threat – to become aware that the physio-emotional experience resides within our own being.

This is not to say that there is never an external threat. But rather, acknowledging that all sensation arises from within – always.

Claiming responsibility for our own reactivity, making it still through our awareness by simply seeing it “as is”, releases the constriction in mind.

We can always drop the story and follow the feeling.

Take 1 breath deeply and slowly, directing the airflow into the ribcage. Then claim this statement out loud (preferable) or in your mind, “This is how I feel right now.” Then, Note the level of intensity from 1-10, 10 being extremely upset.

This is how you claim responsibility for the feeling you are having by directing your attention to the body which calms the mind.

Continue to breath this way as you proceed to take a moment to scan your present environment. A majority of the time the physio-emotional life-event, that initially instigated your upset, has already passed and the perceived threat resides only in mind. Realizing there is no current threat to your body calms the nervous system.

Then ask the question out loud (preferable) or in your mind, “Now how do I feel?” Take a new #, noticing the intensity of your upset has decreased.

It always decreases if you follow these steps.

The active mechanism in this practice is realizing the downshift, from upset to serenity, regardless of how slight.

To complete the exercise, immediately shift your attention to something else. It can be completely random and arbitrary. It would be most beneficial to choose an activity that includes physical discharge. Maybe you go for a walk, wash the dishes, run an errand, complete a task or simply take a nice bath. Regardless of the action, the active mechanism here is the immediate shift into a different activity.

What was once believed to be an unknown force, residing outside of your grasp, now becomes an internalized cauldron of alchemical fire – extinguishing false notions of the limited self, resulting in a radiant array of clear, right-minded disposition to the object of interest.

– The Bioenergist

Suicide Bomber & The T-Cell

Viewing this supports my postulate that war is an archetype of our biology and the two are inextricably linked and in partnership through evolutionary development. Our biological defense systems are deeply engrained in our DNA, much to the extent that they act autonomically in order to sustain our existence.

We may consider the biological function of the T-cell as having the same mechanism as a suicide bomber – self-sacrifice for a purpose. There is only a difference in intent. In our consensual perspective, we agree with T-cells and their purpose. We aim to sustain them. They serve a personal agenda. This still holds true for the bomber, does it not?

Each of us as individuals may carry a different interpretation of the reality, yet we cannot deny that we all have the same organism. In addendum, the external environment works synergystically with the internal machinations of the organism and represents the end result of all of our collective efforts.

Consciousness, on all levels, has the power to sustain patterns, holding concepts, temporarily manifested as form in the reality, as the movement of time continues to unfold. This offers the opportunity for attunement, making corrections as we go, with the intent to refine what we have made in order to serve the whole of existence.

As we live in the natural environment, through our attempts to control it and eachother, we modulate it. In doing so, our body must change in order to cope. How we interpret these changes determines our actions towards the environment. As we create the world around us, we also create our bodies and the construct of our society.

Conversely, the earth also modulates as it moves through the universe. In doing so, we can assume this augments our biology as well, if but only very subtly over a long period of time, for matter is the result of energy moving from the subtle to the gross. It is at this juncture we may also consider how our biological development changes our perception.

The immune system is in the office of interfacing with the environment, as is the nervous system. Anything foreign to the organism may be classified as threatening, activating the sympathetic defense response. This resource is only accessible through loss of some other capacity. In the temporal domain, we may ponder, what resources might we be loosing by sustaining ideas that merit no value for the whole, especially when we bring these ideas into action like that of the suicide bomber?

Just as one sacrifices his body for an unsustainable idea, resulting in an action, do we not treat our bodies harshly when we judge ourselves? Do we not sacrifice the potential for relationship when we treat another harshly? When we deem them threatening in our mind? Do we not aim to control others out of fear that our story may not be true? How much of our economy must go into defense budgets, that support the weaponizing of our world, before we realize that killing people is not sustainable to our existence? And how indifferent must we be in order to see eachother equally?

All of this should go without saying and there are obviously potential threats to our physical safety that exist in this volatile environment we have created for ourselves in the modern world. Our biological defense systems were necessary for our survival before we developed the conscious capacity to reside within nature holistically and with eachother through acceptance. Yet more often than not, what we classify as threatening resides in our temporal reality, where the threat is aimed at the ego –  an idea that resides in consciousness.

Through my research in trauma energetics, I’ve come to the understanding that the major thing separating us from the wild animal kingdom is a highly developed cerebral cortex. We also share the reptilian brain stem, where these autonomic mechanisms reside, although animals are more resilient in their motion from engagement with an environmental threat and back into homeostasis. For us, the culprit resides in our thinking mind where we sustain and act upon concepts that do not serve the whole. Even worse, what we are thinking may not even exist in the reality.

I have also learned that the nervous system will encapsulate traumatic experiences that manifest as holding patterns in the tissues of the body. Our energy system becomes un-regulated and we act out erratically. In the end, we become how we perceive each other and the result is the world we have created together.

When the internal frustration within any nervous system has been supressed for some time, a critial mass is reached and discharge becomes evident. If this energy is not guided by conscious compassion, the human being will react like the animal it is.

I postulate that as the human being develops the capacity to soften the membrane between the environment and the idea of the self, and the societal complexes formed in the process, we may evolve to the point to where we no longer need a nervous system. What will our bodies be like when we no longer polarize ourselves from what is natural?

Our personal boundaries will become expanded to where we no longer fear the embrace of something different in our space. Our minds will be open to resolution instead of remaining fixated on unsustainable ideas. And our hearts will be open to forgiveness. We will have learned to assimilate and forget. And in our motion towards the new now we will embrace what is possible, in the moment when we are there!

And so it is!

Joey Esposito – The Bioenergist